Maddalena Premuti Bonetta

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The Ongon or Invisible Spouse

In the shamanic traditions of Siberia and Mongolia, every human being has their own Ongon: an invisible counterpart, comparable to the aspect we know as "soul-spirit", and that is the part of us with which we are called to unite in every moment to manifest our life in an authentic, pleasant, creative and true way, in harmony with our Deepest Essence.

The Ongon is also called Underworld Spouse or Celestial Spouse depending on which areas of the realm of the Soul and Spirit are taken into consideration.

But why this figure? What is its origin? Life itself is a creative and poetic act (from poíesis, in Greek, creation), and we, like small pulsating particles of this same Life, create in turn the fruit of our existence. If instead of uniting with the soul we unite and “mate” with social patterns, the resulting fruit will be poor and will turn against us, because it is antithetical to our real nature: hence the need to have an image to remember that particular frequency, that particular taste that is released when we feel and experience real deep pleasure, true strength, true freedom and true love: the union of Psyché with Eros is a good representation.

The esoteric Buddhist tradition is also based on the image of an ecstatic union, and it is represented by the Vajradhara, i.e. the Buddha together with his femminine spouse, figured in erotic union in the lotus position.

This beautiful and intense image is present in numerous paintings and statuettes, so as to always remember that existence is a union between two parts: matter (Pakriti) and spirit (Purusha) are inextricably united thanks to eros, to cosmic Shakti which manifests itself in our body through the Kundalini Shakti, a nervous energy of sexual nature. When Kundalini rises through all our energy centres the energy flows freely and can express itself in a particular way through each center but without remaining stuck in any of these.

The divine is multiple, and so are the aspects of our invisible Spouse: it can take on various aspects and manifest itself in various guises and situations, it can wear the garments of our professional success, be reflected in our sentimental partner or even coincide with a journey , a home that we strongly desired, or an encounter with a wild animal or an unknown person.

It can also manifest itself in dreams, the territory of choice of the Invisible Spouse, where the filter of the mind ceases to exist and the entire unconscious and chthonic dimension manifests itself openly. In whatever case our Ongon manifests itself, it will always be a harbinger of a beneficial current, be it profound pleasure, ecstasy, enthusiasm, love or an intense and resounding mystic mystery because when you are truly united with your soul there is no room for anything else.

However, it sometimes happens in life that we want to undertake the underground journey in the most direct and immediate way possible: a strong intention arises in us and we start looking for a missing part of ourselves that we long for, we try to achieve a goal, we look for something whose desire is strongly felt, and when The Bhakta (the lover of the divine) ardently seeks Bhaghavan (the divine in its aspect of pure Love), Bhaghavan ardently seeks the Bhakta; therefore they find each other, unite, and love each other, and they actually realise that they have always been in each other, in the same way that the seed is in the tree and the tree is enclosed within the seed.

In the book I wrote “Throw the scale - Transform excess weight into creative energy” (which you can find here) there is a shamanic yoga flow called “Surrendering to the divine” where I guide you step by step to join your invisible spouse so that every mental doubt dissolves in their embrace.

How to contact the Ongon in our life? When we want to join our Ongon, we must imagine and call in an anthropomorphic figure of the sexual gender that most unleashes our erotic, sensual and sexual imagination.

There are three genders available: male, female and androgynous.

  • Through imagination combined with sensation, we thus evoke an emotion, a state of mind that we strongly want to experience: the emotion or state of mind that we are evoking is a Spirit, (and it is an aspect of our Ongon) and also in this case we will visualise them in anthropomorphic features and we will rely on his presence, imagining being mouth to mouth and breathing their breath.

Everything you want to feel, live and experience in your life is already part of you at a certain level, since the whole Existence lives within you. So listen to yourself, feel within yourself, which aspect of existence your soul strongly desires to experience and live, with which spirit you want to unite, and then evoke it, evoke it, evoke it, call it in and feel it in, open yourself to receive it and welcome it, already feeling it as part of you and let this spirit spread gently throughout your body, so that it penetrates deeply into every cell and that it blends itself with the flow of your own blood. What you are evoking arises first of all in yourself and when you offer yourself as its home you slowly begin to experience it through your body, in every sensation, thought, idea and action of your life... and then it will also manifest itself outside of you as a natural reflection of your renewed internal state.

When there is a change in consciousness, the physical conditions of existence also change.

  • Through the mantra of the Mystical Marriage (spread in the West by Selene C.W. in the tradition of the Mother Mantra) which is the following

Ayà Samas when a male figure is evoked

Ayà Samaya when a female figure is evoked

Ayà Samanthà when evoking an androgynous figure

Ayà must be pronounced or thought at the moment of exhalation

Samas/Samayà/Samanthà must be pronounced or thought at the moment of inhalation, since by inhaling it is reabsorbed into us.

When to practice? In every moment of need, but it can be a good practice to do it in the evening before falling asleep, so as to call our chthonic part to guide us in the invisible world, be it underground or celestial. Thanks to this union we will develop an expanded mind, we will be more creative in true union with our soul, in ways that we may not even imagine right now: let the mystery speak through you!

I remember, several years ago, after having evoked the Ongon before falling asleep, I dreamed of a young man with the appearance of a fairly well-known character, we were in a car, then the car started to fly, then the car was no longer there and there it was just the two of us flying side by side over the Caribbean sea, with its turquoise and emerald colours, and I still remember the strong scent of the sea and salt that was released in this dream.

What we live and experience "outside of us" is directly connected to everything that lives inside us.

The good news is that we can act in our interiority through these suggestive and poetic practices in order to give Life the possibility of manifesting itself through us in its splendor, unknown and untold and often feared by our mental superstructures.

May everything in you be joy, this is your goal!